“FEAR IS ALWAYS ABOUT THAT WHICH IS NOT YET, AND NEVER GOING TO BE”. – SADH GURU
Fear is something we all are afraid of. Some peoples are more afraid than others, but we all feel the fear. Most of the fear is generated by ourselves. According to a study, around 92% situations we are afraid of actually never take place. Out of remaining 8%, around 4% of it are those where we do not have any control and around 2% of it depends on someone else. It means we have control only on remaining 2% percent of situations we are afraid of. It seems manageable now. Isn’t it?
Mahatma Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, Martin Luther King Jr., Steve Jobs, Graham Bells and Mahomed Ali are among the thousand names who were able to defeat the fear. One of the qualities they all share is a burning desire they had for their vision. When they knew their purpose, nothing was there to afraid of. It is not that they do not feel the fear, but their strength to defeat it was stronger.
We all carry that strength. We all have the moments when we have an experience that strength. We can recall those moments and understand what ignited that courage. Our most fears are state of our mind. If we learn to change the state, we can defeat the fear. That is how ordinary people achieve greatness.
What are we afraid of?
In simple words, we are afraid of the unknown. Human is born only with two types of fears. The fear of falling and fear caused by noises. All others are learnt fear. We learn it from our parents, teachers, friends, society and other mediums such as news, social media and so on. We are always told how trying new things are not safe, how we should play safe, and how we must protect everything we have. These practices slowly become our behaviour and then character. We start doing them without thinking.
How to overcome the fear?
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As self-confidence, positive thinking, self-doubt, extrovert, introvert and many others, fear is also one of the elements of human characteristics. We can learn or unlearn any behaviour with practice. Your vision and your purpose are the main tools to defeat the fear. By practising daily, we can find the courage which is buried within us and become the person who is beyond the fear.
1. Address your fears.
To solve any problem, we must first understand that what the problem is. Once you understand, what you are afraid of, you can make a plan to deal with it. This step is crucial because 98% percent chances are there that you will not have to do anything. You need to understand what kind of fears you are feeling in a particular situation.
Think of something you always wanted to do, but you have never started because you are afraid. It might be starting your own business, writing a book, starting a website. Make a list of all the fears you can think of. Go deep inside you. Write down everything crosses your mind. Remember that you are writing it for yourself and there is nobody to judge you so just keep writing until you have left with nothing in your mind.
Define your fears.
To defeat fear, you must understand that what are the fears you have right now. To explain it in detail, I divided fears into four categories.
1. FEAR OF FUTURE.
These are the fears we imagine in our mind. For example, if you want to start a business. You might imagine people will call me crazy if I do it or I will fail or I will not have any money left. You do not know actually what will happen. People actually might appreciate you and in most cases, this is true.
2. FEAR OF PAST.
These are the fears which come from past experiences. For example, you have a fear that you will fail, if you start your own business because it happened in the past.
3. FEAR OF NEGATIVITY.
These are the fears which come from outside such as news, friends, or family. The economy is bad or nobody is buying anything or there is a lot of competition out there. These are the examples of these fears.
4. FEAR OF PRESENT.
These fears come from your present circumstances. Some examples are here. I do not have the money or I do not have experience or I do not have time etc. These fears can be considered as real fears.
Take your list and write down no 1, or 2, or 3, or 4 based on the category you think suits it better. Now, make a new list with the category 4 fears. Voila! You are left with only 2% of your list. The good news is that all these fears are manageable. There is always some actions you can take about them. Now, this is your new list of fears.
Decide what actions you can take.
“WE GENERATE FEARS WHILE WE SIT. WE OVERCOME THEM BY ACTION”. – DR HENRY LINK
Now that you are left with a very small no of fears which you can actually do something about, make a list of actions you can take on these. You do not have to do something special. It can be anything you can do in your current situation.
Your list can be from one to five actions. Do not try to be perfect. Remember perfection is also a kind of fear. It stops us from getting started.
Take action. If you fail, take action again.
Photo by Braden Collum